I only got a little bit of sleep and 3:30 am came way too early. I woke up without a problem, but my emotions and nerves started immediately. Am I doing the right thing? What if something goes wrong? So many questions ran through my mind, but when I looked at our last ultrasound picture, I knew deep down this was the right decision. You, my baby boy, deserve every chance and possibility that this surgery can provide.
We were running a little bit behind, but we made it to Vanderbilt. We checked in at labor and delivery and waited until my nurse came to get me. Matt and I gave hugs and kisses to my parents and Matt's mom because we weren't sure if we would see them again before the surgery and then we were led to my room. The room was very large, I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it was very nice. I almost broke down when I saw the baby bed, but I held it together. The nurse quickly explained the timeline for the morning and then left for me to change.
The gown was very interesting and Matt and I had a blast trying to figure out how to tie it. I'm not sure if I ended up with a messed up one, but the strings didn't line up the way that you would think that they would. I'm sure it would have been priceless watching us with the gown, but somehow Matt tied it just in time for the nurse to come back in and tell us that it didn't need to be tied. Oh well, it was worth a few laughs. I got my IV put in and hooked up the fetal monitor to check on Jackson and make sure that I wasn't having any contractions. I still say that there isn't a sound any better than your baby's heartbeat.
I was scheduled to be wheeled back to surgery at 7:30. I couldn't believe how quickly the time went by. My parents and Matt's mom were able to come to the room before surgery and we were able to talk. Before I knew it, all of the doctor's were coming in to say hello and give their speech about their part of the surgery. My anxiety level was pretty high to start with, but once several doctors were in the room at the same time, it became too much for me to handle. I had a little bit of a meltdown and asked for my parents and Matt's mom to leave. I felt absolutely awful about having them leave and wished that I could have held it together for a little bit longer, but they told me afterwards that it was OK and they understood.
The anesthesiologist came in and gave me some "happy juice" right before I was wheeled away to surgery. It was so hard to say goodbye to Matt. I was so scared and I could tell that he was too, but with a kiss, I was taken back to surgery. I remember the room being fairly large, extremely cold, and very bright. There were so many people already in the room and they all said hello when I was wheeled in. I was transferred into another bed and had to sit up on the side so I could get my epidural put in. A nurse stood in front of me and held on to me while the anesthesiologist went to work. Thank goodness for the "happy juice." I felt a little bit of a pinch, but nothing too extreme. I was told to lay down and to relax. I could hear a lot of people talking, but I wasn't able to look around, all I could look at was the ceiling. Next thing I knew, I heard the anesthesiologist tell me to take a few deep breathes and to count down from 10. "10, 9, 8..." then nothing.
I woke up in the surgery room listening to the nurse tell me how everything went. She explained that everything went well and that I was going to be taken back to my room where Matt, Matt's mom, and my parents were waiting. I remember the ride back to my room and telling myself to wake up every time I tried to doze back off. I was quickly hooked back up to all of the monitors and remember looking at everyone. I was given the magical button of pain medicine and told how to use it and how often it would work. I surprisingly felt very well as far as pain goes. However, I quickly got an upset stomach, thankfully though, it didn't last very long. Everyone kept saying how surprised they were that I was so awake and coherent.
Matt explained that he was kept updated the entire time during surgery. Ms. Mary called him at each stage to let him know what was going on. He was called when anesthesia was done, when I was first being opened, when Jackson's surgery started, and then when I was being closed back up. He told me that Jackson's surgery ended up taking longer than originally planned, but that he did great and that the doctors were really impressed by him.
The doctors came in for a quick check-up and explained that they would be back tomorrow to discuss the surgery and answer any questions that we may have. Shortly after that, everyone left with the exception of Matt and I was left to rest. Well, rest in between my hourly checks by my nurse. :)
Crystal
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